The curious disappearance of Jo and other mysteries

Tis been a while since my last blog post, I’ll give you that.

What have I been doing you may ask? Well I’ve been doing some writing, doing some reading, oh, AND I’VE BEEN GIVING BIRTH TO TWINS!!!!!

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Funny story. My husband, who from this point forward will be known as The Bearded Beefcake…

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or T.B.B for short, decided that our perfect (hahahahaha, right) little family unit could do with some new talent. So we wrote many letters to Santa because everyone knows that’s where babies come from and what did that sadistic son of whorish reindeer do? He put twins in me! That was double the babies required. Santa was obviously feeling very generous. I hope you kids put in requests for big ticket items last Christmas.

I actually had a feeling it might be twins. I just needed to think about peeing on my pregnancy test for that sucker to show positive and what I thought were cramps were in fact two aliens terraforming my womb.

What do they look like is the question I’m sure you’re asking. I’d love to show you a picture, they are cute, but I’m holding out for one of those big million dollar magazine spread deals, so I’ll give you an interpretation instead.

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Aren’t they beautiful? This is a very accurate representation. Even though they’re identical, they are quite easy to tell apart.

Twin 1 is wearing the pink nappy and speaking french, while Twin 2 is the surly one in the pink nappy whose job it is to cry just as I’ve put my toast in the toaster. For you toast connoisseurs out there, you’ll know that cold toast pretty much tastes like, well, cold toasted bread. Sure, it’s still high in fibre I guess, but it is super low in yum.

Anyways, I’ve finally reached a point in my twin-wrangling where I can start getting back to the things I enjoy. Like writing, blogging and confusing door-to-door salespeople by standing at the window staring at them while they knock. They’re all like, “are you going to answer the door?” and I’m all like *blank stare* and then they slowly walk away.

That’ll show those smug clipboard carriers. They think they’re so cool in their puffer jackets. You know, I could get a picture of myself laminated and hang it around my neck on a lanyard if I wanted to. You’re not better than me, salespeople! I don’t want to change power companies!!!!!

Anyways. I’ll have more twin tales to come, as well as other exciting rants such as “Are my shoes shrinking?” and “You’re not allowed to park your car there. Why are you parking your car there?”

On the writing front, I’ve recently finished a YA space opera which was a lot of fun and got me back into writing after such a long break. Now time to hit Light of Mytis, Ardentia 3. I think people have waited long enough.

I’ll be releasing more details in the coming weeks, but for now, you can add Light of Mytis to your Goodreads TBR.

Chat more soon.

 

 

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Jo read a book

Oh, hey there.

Welcome to a new segment at the regularly updated (bahahahahaha) JLTOMLINSON.COM.

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Disclaimer: I am crap at reviews. I can’t even fathom how book bloggers keep their content so fresh and engaging. You’ll find that most of the time, my reviews will end with, yep, it was good. If you’re after an in depth book review blog, you’ve come to the wrong place. WIth that said…

Many things can draw me into a book. A snazzy prose, free-flowing dialogue and of course, a cover of excellence.

Blackfin Sky by Kat Ellis has a super fantastic cover. It made me ooh and ahh and click BUY pretty much immediately.

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Seeeeeeeeeee!!!!!

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Blackfin Sky is set in the creepy and mysterious town of Blackfin and tells the strange tale of a girl named Sky who suddenly appears at school after being dead for months. Sounds pretty kickass right? Throw in some weird townsfolk, unexplained happenings and a burned out circus and you’ve got what adds up to be a nifty little YA read.

This is standalone, no pesky cliff hangers here, but there is still room for growth in the world if the author felt like it.

I give it 4 Keanu Thumbs

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What’s that? This review was so amazing that you want to read this book right away!

Here, have some links!!!!!

Goodreads     Amazon

And so ends Jo Read A Book.
Join me next week when we delve into the fascinating world of macaroni necklaces.

Blog update: Time for a new book!

Oh, hi. Remember me?

I don’t even know where the last few months have gone. I hope they’ve been great for you, lots of happy family memories, career goals achieved, maybe a long lost relative appearing from nowhere and presenting you with a ridiculously enormous family fortune. That would be pretty sweet.

What have I been doing? Writing. Always writing… and as you know…

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My latest book, Veil of the Corrupter, was released in April and I have been overwhelmed with the response I’ve received from readers. Thank you so much to all those who purchased a copy or took the time to read and review an ARC. You have no idea how much your support means to me.

Veil was such a fun book to write and now it’s time to get to work on the 3rd book in the Ardentia series. The Light of Mytis is underway with a synopsis and cover ready in a couple of months.

I am also writing some Ardentia novellas which is exciting. The first will focus on the character, Sylviette, and will centre around the events that caused her to leave Narcea and also her fateful meeting with Myole.

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I know. You can’t wait. These novellas will be free on my blog.

I also have a side project. Do you like the paranormal?

Do you like romance?

Do you like… PARANORMAL ROMANCE!!??!

Then I may have a treat for you. I’ve been curious about Wattpad for sometime now, and with paranormal romance being quite a saturated market, I thought it might be fun to use Wattpad as a place for my own addition to the genre.

This is a work in progress, and I’ll be putting up a new chapter each week. When it’s all done, I’ll pull it down and give it an edit and a look over, so be sure to check in each week to see if it’s up your alley.

Please be aware that unlike the Ardentia series, this is more adult-ish.

Check the deets, yo

Click here to read Here After by J.L. Tomlinson via Wattpad.com

When Nick loses Karen, the life they had planned suddenly becomes a painful memory.

Each day is a struggle as he goes through the motions to live some sort of semblance of a life without her, attending medical school and indulging friends and family who tell him it’s time to move on.

A chance meeting reintroduces him to Sam, the odd lilac haired girl who frequents the cemetery and always says the wrong thing. Sam can often be found talking to herself, which is worrisome considering she’s studying to be a doctor just like Nick. But Sam isn’t talking to herself, she’s speaking to those that linger, to spirits who walk between the veil of the living and the dead.

Nick’s logical mind tells him that such a thing is insane, that is until Sam reveals her newest ghostly acquaintance is Karen.

As Nick delves deeper into the unnatural and unsettling world that Sam endures daily, he will question if a broken heart can ever truly be healed and if true love really can transcend the here and the here after.

Calling all Beta Readers

For future books, I am wanting to put together a group of beta readers for feedback on my novels. If you’re a fan of my writing and would like to be be a part of this beta group, please send me an email at jotomlinsontales@gmail.com.

Beta readers will be the first to read my books in their edited draft form and receive delicious swag such as paperbacks and lollipops.

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and now for…

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What am I totally obsessed with you may ask.

VIKINGS OMGWTFYESYESYES VIKINGS!!?!??!?!1111??

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It’s just gah, crazy good. Why does it always take me so long to get on the bandwagon of something awesome?

Yes, I’m talking to you gangnam style…

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Anyways. Vikings is fan-friggin-tastic. The writing is great, the cinematography is great, the costumes are great, and oh yes TRAVIS FIMMEL IS MAGNIFICENT. Let’s get past the fact that the man is beautiful. You know how I feel about beards. His portrayal of Ragnar is superb. It is so delicate and subtle, he is absolutely mesmerising. Watch it now. It’s just so good.

End of update.

Countdown To Veil – Oh The Excitement!!!!??!!!!

I’ve been the worst blogger. I know. My legions (or handful, give or take) of loyal readers have gone full-on crazy in my absence no doubt.

The good news is, I’ve been busy WRITING which is what this blog is all about.

The bad news? I have a severe KitKat addiction. They are amazeballs.

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The big news of the day is of course…

Veil of the Corrupter releases in four weeks!!!!

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Read an excerpt here.

Veil has more action, more danger, more excitement but still with the same low calories. That means you can read Veil guilt free!

And for those who haven’t started their journey into Ardentia yet (yeah, you in the back with the chips), The Empyrean Key is 99c at various online retailers. Find the links here!

Veil of the Corrupter is getting some great early reviews. The amazing blogger, Sparrowhawk, has posted her review of the advanced reading copy she received and in true Sparrowhawk form, it was amazingly detailed and beautifully presented. She also gave Veil 5 STARS which is an added bonus. Check it out here!

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I have another giveaway going on Goodreads. This is for an autographed paperback of Veil of the Corrupter. Go enter!

Goodreads Giveaway – Open Internationally –
One signed paperback of Veil of the Corrupter

Time to start work on the third book in the Ardentia series, as well as a couple of other projects I have on the side.

Be sure to spread the word, get more people reading The Empyrean Key and be sure to pre-order Veil of the Corrupter!

New Year. New Look. New Book.

Happy New Year, one and all.

I tell you what, getting back into the blogging groove was harder than expected. I had the most amazing three week holiday where after a hectic year, I was at last able to spend some quality time with my super awesome family.

Did I drink? Yes. Was I merry? Yes. Did I eat? Oh yes. I ate a lot. But I don’t care if I got some extra junk in this trunk, I got a man *snap fingers*.

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Anyways. I have given the blog a bit of a makeover, so hopefully content will be easier to find and I’m happy to announce that the release date for Veil of the Corrupter has been set for April 3 2015.

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You can even pre-order from Amazon. Go on. Do it!

There will also be a paperback version ready upon release and further pre-order links from smashwords will be up in the coming weeks.

For all those waiting on ARCs, I will be emailing out ebooks January 31st and appreciate you taking the time to read and review Veil of the Corrupter before release. If you are a blogger or reviewer who may be interested in getting your sticky little hands on a copy, please get in touch. I would love to hear from you.

giveawayWith Veil only months away, there is no better time to grab yourself a copy of The Empyrean Key. I am currently giving away two autographed copies at Goodreads. You should enter!

Click here to see the Goodreads giveaway page!

Or if you haven’t yet started your journey through Ardentia and just can’t wait, you can always grab a paperback for $10 or the ebook for only 99c!

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I know. I can’t believe it either. 99c people. Click here for links to get yourself a copy!

And remember, word of mouth is the best promotion any author can hope for. If you enjoyed The Empyrean Key, please let people know and be sure to leave ratings and reviews. It means a lot and I appreciate every single one.

Now, are you excited to rejoin Jahna, Lilac, Silko and Arn? Who are you most looking forward to catching up with?

Time to get back to work!!!

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Top Ten Christmas Movie Epicness – You Asked For It! (Not Really)

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I’ve had a crazy couple of weeks. Between my home and work life being utterly insane, as well as editing  my poor blog has suffered terribly.

I will be posting soon with release dates and giveaways!!

I’ve been threatening for months to do this and here it finally is.

Enjoy my Top Ten. Get these movies. Watch them with your family. Your Christmas will be better for it, I promise you.
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Starbucks dodge taxes but not my tastebuds… Worst title ever

I almost didn’t post this week. I’ve been super mega busy with editing Veil of the Corrupter and for anyone who hasn’t noticed, it’s friggin Christmas!!! Which means decorating, listening to Mariah’s “All I want for Christmas is you” on repeat and spending ridiculous amounts of money while my husband yells “Rabble Rabble!!!!” and tries to hide his wallet from me.

Little does he know I’ve put a lojack on it… I’m kidding! I have my own money, I’m an independent woman and all that…

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No but srsly I want his money to buy dancing santas…

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As you all know, Christmas makes me giddy.

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It also means that Starbucks have some new delicious themed drink. This year I tried the Peppermint Frappucino and I know some people hate Starbucks for ethical and economical reasons, but I just want my Christmas drink ok, leave me alone. I refuse to let you ruin my special holiday.

Anyways, for those who visit my little blog for book stuff, here are some fun facts you should know…

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I will be announcing the release date for Veil of the Corrupter at the end of December. It will be available for pre order through amazon on kindle and paperback, as well as smashwords and itunes.

Bloggers or reviewers who are interested in an E-ARC of Veil can send me a message. I would LOVE to hear from you!

I will giving away autographed copies of The Empyrean Key in paperback, both here and at goodreads.com, also at the end of December.

I am working on a new YA Fantasy book that is a loose retelling of Beauty and the Beast. I’m hoping to get the first draft nailed down in the new year.

And now for those who just looove my midweek motivators…. Guess what?

IT’S CHRISTMAS THEMED !!!!!!*FREAKOUT*!!!!!!

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EDIBLE: Pavlova – A Kiwi classic. It’s all meringue (Fun Fact: I never spell meringue right, I mean, that’s not what it sounds like; meringue, that doesn’t seem right. I bet the inventor spelled it wrong and everyone just went with it), whipped cream and fresh summer fruits like strawberries, grapes, kiwifruit and passionfruit. YUM. When this is on the table I feel like Christmas just exploded on my face! Wait. What?

VISUAL: This was tough because Christmas is not traditionally associated with hot dudes. Most guys in Christmas movies are dads who wear festive jumpers and a good pair of slacks. Oh but wait. Die Hard is kind of a Christmas movie. It takes place during Christmas, and who’s in Die Hard? Bruce “Yipee-ki-yay Mother#@!!@*#” Willis that’s who! Rather than a festive jumper he struts about in a bloody wife-beater wielding a Beretta 92F. Awww yeah.

AUDIBLE: Mariah Carey is straight up cray-cray but when this song is on the radio you better move aside because Jo is about to RIP.IT.UP.

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